I can be a bit of a control freak when it comes to certain things… mainly my life.
Patience as the average person thinks of it has never been a problem for me, but waiting patiently with purpose and being actively engaged in faithful patience is not easy for me. Trusting in others is something that has always been easy for me to do, and I do it willingly – sometimes to my own determent. I’ve giving my trust to people who have shown they were not worthy of it, and they have shown it in ways that has caused great harm to me. Still I am trusting by nature. I generally trust people until they give me reason not to, even then I am quick to forgive. Not forgiving affects me more than it ever would them, so I forgive because I need to. Lack of control is akin to uncertainty and is difficult for me because I am a planner, organizer and go-getter by nature, so not taking the steps I naturally want to take and instead waiting for an answer from Him (the Lord) the come is not easy. Yet, I am trying to have more faith. I am learning to not just have more faith, but I am learning to listen, I am learning to ask for help when I need it and before I need it. I am learning that part of trust and faith in Him is showing more gratitude. I am learning that He is one person I can trust to not harm me. I am learning that in order to have trust and faith in Him, I have to let go of control.
“Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.” Proverbs 3:5